How to Design a More Meaningful Wedding

I’ve often been asked to recall the most memorable wedding I’ve ever been to. I’ve been to over 250 weddings, from beaches to ballrooms, backyards to rooftops. I’ve been to huge spectacles ripped from the pages of a magazine, and intimate elopements in the mist of a waterfall in the middle of the jungle. I’ve worked with some of the best planners in the business, and attended some of the sweetest DIY gatherings. But the wedding that sticks out most in my mind is one where nearly everything went wrong.

It was the beginning of the rainy season in Costa Rica, though you could usually count on a few dry hours in the afternoons most days. This was not one of those days. There was a torrential downpour that began once everyone was already gathered on the beach, a very long walk from any kind of shelter. But rain was not unexpected, so everyone had been given a white umbrella. When the bride and groom came together, the 40 or so guests closed in around them with our umbrellas, creating a canopy that we all huddled under together. We were all united in this moment, everyone working together to create a protective bubble around this moment. There was something special about that feeling of we’re-all-in-this-together. Everyone had a shared purpose, and the closeness made us all a part of what was happening. We were not a mere audience, but an active part of the emotional ceremony. It…